Applying to the Banff Centre for the Arts – and doing it badly

First off, let me say that my application itself was flawless. I had the help (and limitless patience) of my friend Jenn, who is a masterful editor and essentially the coolest mofo since whoever invented the toothbrush. My essays were flawless, my biography and resume were on point, my portfolio was acceptable, and my money was good. Problem was, it seemed, that I couldn’t tell the difference between “Winter”, and “Late Winter”. Double check the calendar? Nah. That’s what normal, well organized people do. Notice late that your application says “Late Winter”, and not just “Winter”? Here’s how it goes:

Oh! Tech support said something about changing it on my profile! Better just SUBMIT IT FIRST so I can save it before changing the dates.

What-

Wha-

Why can’t I?

It says…

Oh lord.

NO

NO

CALL TECH SUPPORT!

Hello? Hi, so I submitted it can I-

What do you mean you can’t change it?

I guess I should point out that my schedule is open for either dates, but still. I rushed frantically for two days to put together this submission, including finishing a ‘proof of concept’ painting (seen above) at lightning pace to have it submitted for TONIGHT at 11pm. Turns out I submitted for their September 5th deadline, so all that frantic energy kind of went to waste. Still, I left the Dean of Registration a voicemail, and either way I have my stuff submitted, but at the same time I didn’t win a race. I did the race two months early. Life will be life though. At least I don’t have to worry about it anymore.

Enjoy the painting.